Weight Loss and Reality

Today I read a blog post from Brooke at Brooke: Not On A Diet blog.  She was approached to be a Success Story on the Shape website after losing over 172 pounds and she declined because they wouldn’t show her after picture (right) in a two-piece swimsuit.  They said it was policy for people to be fully clothes, but Brooke beleived that it was because it showed the reality of what happens to a body after massive weight loss.  Interesting.

This started me thinking about my own journey.  In the early 2000’s I lost over 170 pounds and kept it off for many years.  It felt wonderful and I looked great.  Several people asked me what happened to my extra skin.  My answer was “you don’t want to see me naked!” The extra skin doesn’t go away, it’s just there.  It is part of the process when you lose over half your body weight.  It is also a dream buster.  All the years I was fat I fantasied about how wonderful it would be to be thin.  I envisioned myself as my early 20's self, with a fit body and wearing a cute outfit, exposing lots of skin.  Reality is a bitch sometimes. The truth was I was in my late 40’s and I had lots of loose skin that had to be camouflaged with clothes (and Spanx).  Thankfully, I had inherited good skin and it did adjust some but it was still a reality of weight loss I wasn’t ready for and it was a huge disappointment. I had totally bought into the American standard of beauty.  

Today I am feeling the beginning of that same process. After losing 40 pounds I see that my skin is getting baggy and loose.  I held my arm up the other day and the skin on my forearm was a mass of wrinkles.  I looked at it and could hardly believe it was my own body I was looking at.  Old lady arms.  Frightening!  My stomach is getting flabby and my thighs are sagging.  It is really not a pretty picture at all.  But as I see it, it’s much better than staying fat.  It is a reality of losing weight that makes me cringe, but I must lean to accept. Especially now, pushing 60.  The skin just doesn't have the elasticity it used to!

Reading Brooke’s blog post today helped me put it in perspective. Extra skin is a reality of extreme weight loss.  It is a fact and something no one who loses over 100 pounds can escape. What has to happen is a mental change in the way we look at it. Trying to hide it under clothes, like the Shape people wanted to do, is covering up a reality. We need to adjust our perception and practice a more loving approach to our bodies.  Well, that’s what I am going to do.  Accepting what is, and loving my body today is ultimate self-acceptance.  There is no shame.  Although society may find it unpleasant and the standards are all askew, the truth is deeply personal. I can either join the misguided public opinion and judge myself harshly my their standards, or I can love my body and all that it’s been though (and continues to go through) and be proud. I can be part of the change or I can continue to live under the unrealistic ideals that I used to believe in.  I’m with Brooke.  It’s time to face reality, see it for what it is and re-define beauty.

Big love,